Favourite Engineering quotes.

[HomeUseParticipant @homeuse]

A quote from an old engineer “ If it don’t knock a bit and don,t rattle then it aint going proper” – He worked on Steam and first age Gas Oil

[Russell EberhardtParticipant @russelleberhardt48058]

Posted by Ady1 on 18/09/2014 08:49:50:

Aeronautical engineer Sir Sydney Camm

ISTR that he was brother of F.J. Camm editor of many technical hobby magazines.

Russell.

[HopperParticipant @hopper]

Oooh, don't strain it lad — use a bigger hammer. (Sarky old foreman when I was a lad)

In theory, theory is the same as practice. In practice, it ain't. (Yogi Berra)

[Danny M2ZParticipant @dannym2z]

The Ark was designed by an amateur, the Titanic was designed by engineers.

[jason udallParticipant @jasonudall57142]

Titanic. …yeah and allocated life boats by an accountant. .
Btw..the biblical Ark was allegedly designed by the alleged ultimate engineer…not noah

Edited By jason udall on 18/09/2014 13:43:52

[Ian S CParticipant @iansc]

Over the last dozen or so years I'v been assisting in building an agricultural machine for feed out large square bails of hay, our testing system is to send the machine off with the farmer, so he can do his best to break it, it's usually the farm labourer who manages to do it. We'v got it fairly right now. Ian S C

[Mike PooleParticipant @mikepoole82104]

It always makes me smile when looking at the build quality of military equipment. It has to be reliable in battlefield conditions but also has to be 'squaddie proof'

Mike

[mike TParticipant @miket56243]

If you think you have designed it to be idiot proof…….then you have probably underestimated the resourcefulness of the average idiot. anon

[jim’Participant @jim11037]

If you can't make it right, make it bright

[chris stephensParticipant @chrisstephens63393]

Many years ago when I used to help service narrow boats for hire, I learnt from an old timer that there were several degrees of quality. There was idiot proof, then came squaddie proof, then best of all hirer proof! Some of which you wondered how they got to be old enough to hire.

[Michael GilliganParticipant @michaelgilligan61133]

Found this one, today …

Joseph Whitworth [to his BlackSmith, whose shop was untidy]:

“Remember this, Charlesworth, the busier you are the tidier you should be.”

MichaelG.

[John Stevenson 1Participant @johnstevenson1]

Well sod that for a game of soldiers, I'm not changing my name to Charlesworth for anyone…………………………

[Ian S CParticipant @iansc]

Me to, neither. Ian S C

[Martin CottrellParticipant @martincottrell21329]

Nice little quote from a Civil Engineer colleague today that made me chuckle after some gentle ribbing from me over a minor cock-up….. "Even engineers make mistakes, that's why they fit rubbers on pencils!!"

Martin.

[Brian AbbottParticipant @brianabbott67793]

Edited By Brian Abbott on 25/09/2014 21:02:39

[Brian AbbottParticipant @brianabbott67793]

short while ago one of maintenance guys had to repair the table lift on an old milling machine, on completion he continued to raise the table on doing so there was a scream from the gears, apparently that's the ' newness '

[Richard MarksParticipant @richardmarks80868]

If it's too hard to do then it's not worth doing, so says Homer Simpson

[JohnFParticipant @johnf59703]

Precision —– fits where it touches and touches everywhere !

[Neil WyattModerator @neilwyatt]

Here's a controversial one; "Good is good enough".

Some say it's the difference between making a profit and going bankrupt in style.

Neil

[Ian S CParticipant @iansc]

I can remember one of my primary school teachers saying to me "near enough is not good enough, your best is required".

Ian S C

[Alan JacksonParticipant @alanjackson47790]

Here is a draughtsman's one. "You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead"

Alan

Edited By Alan Jackson on 26/09/2014 10:03:42

[chris stephensParticipant @chrisstephens63393]

Always aim for perfection, but it is OK to settle for excellence.

[Geoff TheasbyParticipant @geofftheasby]

Cheap, Fast, Accurate – choose any two!

Geoff

[John ShepherdParticipant @johnshepherd38883]

1. An engineer is someone who washes his hands before going to the toilet.

2. From an engineering company who supplied equipment to the police service: 'We can copper plate it but we can't copper proof it'.

3. A good machinist is someone who knows how a part will turn out before they start. (I wish).

[Neil WyattModerator @neilwyatt]

Corollary to John's point 1: never shake hands with vets, plumbers or engineers.

[Author]

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