In Sparey's book "The Amateur's Lathe, the height is found by standing upright against a wall with the arms extended downwards. Now bend the forearm upwards at the elbow and make a mark on the wall at the point where the bent elbow lies. It is at this height that the top surface of the topslide should be set.(also a good height for the bench vice).
For the bench he suggests 2 x 2 angle iron, or 3 x 3 wood, and 2" planks for the top,(he probably means a hard wood, not pine), how about Jara, or similar good Ausie hard wood, and you can machine it like steel, I know, I tried it when I was wood turning, one cut, sharpen chisel, boy it was hard work.
Stan Bray suggests the top should be moderately thick metal, or shuttering plywood, or block board, or even a couple of layers of thick chipboard. What ever wood is used , a layer of formica (or sheet metal) shold go on under the lathe.
If you make it an inch or two too high, you can use duck boards in front, but make it too low, and you'll have a sore back. Ian S C