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  • #257325
    steamdave
    Participant
      @steamdave

      This came out about 10 years ago, but still raises a chuckle.

      Microsoft vs. General Motors

      At a recent computer expo, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.

      In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

      1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
      2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
      3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
      4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
      5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive – but would run on only five percent of the roads.
      6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "General Protection Fault" warning light.
      7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
      8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
      9. Every time GM introduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
      10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

      Dave
      The Emerald Isle

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      #257347
      david williams 14
      Participant
        @davidwilliams14
        #257386
        Neil Wyatt
        Moderator
          @neilwyatt
          Posted by Michael Gilligan on 22/09/2016 13:13:18:

          Posted by Neil Wyatt on 22/09/2016 11:54:14:

          Shouldn't that be 'bodyshell', as I recall the main protection for the occupant was a 'stylish' cagoule with elastic around the bottom.

          .

          Sorry, Neil … Your "bodyshell" joke is lost on me.

          Maybe I should have typed 'bodyshellsuit'?

          N.

          #257400
          Michael Gilligan
          Participant
            @michaelgilligan61133
            Posted by Neil Wyatt on 22/09/2016 20:37:56:

            Maybe I should have typed 'bodyshellsuit'?

            .

            It's O.K. … I did 'get' what you were trying to say

            … It just wasn't relevant

            MichaelG.

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